Executive Director Jennifer Armson-Dyer: Decision making in a time of too much info
Tuesday, November 10th, 2020
By Jennifer Armson-Dyer ~ Executive Director
We are living in an era of bombardment.
It seems that at all times, we are being overwhelmed with information, opinions or just noise. Even as I sit here and write this in a quiet house, I have pages of To Do’s staring at me, emails in three different accounts popping up, social media notifications going off, group chats on two phones flashing, at least two “Hamilton” songs playing simultaneously in my head and I *really* want to turn on a Hallmark Christmas movie to use as background noise.
However, when I become overwhelmed, I know I shut down. I freeze and I’m unable to focus or move in any direction. I know this situation isn’t unique to me, and the club volleyball world as a whole is also not immune to this.
In the Badger Region “office” — even if the office is in our individual homes right now — we go through cycles of customer service topics. In the late summer and early fall, it’s about memberships and picking a club. How and which membership to purchase, how to fix things, tryout questions, etc. As a staff, we discuss the best strategies to get the word out, knowing that people won’t read most of the information, and we try to navigate as best we can.
We’re over-communicators in our office and as a journalism major, that’s fine with me, as 99 percent of solutions to problems in the world can be solved with communication. However, how do we combat informational bombardment with over-communication?
The late fall into early winter is the time when it’s clear that these two opposing forces have reached their peak. We often receive questions of how to decommit from a club, how to remove a coach, how to get out of a contract and similar topics. Oftentimes, families and clubs find themselves in these situations because of what I described above: they freeze, they shut down and they’re unable to process any more information. When I personally get into this phase, I’m aware enough of what’s going on, and can take steps to remedy it.
Here’s my warning to you to take a breath and focus, in order to help you navigate the club volleyball world. There are a few specific areas I’d like to focus on.
Choosing A Club
Clubs are their own independent businesses, and as such, are working to get your business. There are big clubs, medium clubs and small clubs – and there is a size that is right for everyone based on what they’re looking for. I urge you to block out the rumors that you heard from Karen up the block about why Big Club Roast Beef is the best and why Small Club Cheese Curd is terrible. Go to the club websites and social media – you can get a feel for the club based on their posting. But best of all, TALK to the director or a coach. You will get a sense – or not – if your family will fit with how that club operates. Even if the interaction isn’t want you want, that is information that you can use to narrow your choices based on what you *don’t* want in a club.
Choosing A Coach
Sometimes, but not all the time, players and families choose a club just for the coach. While this often works out great, I would caution you that most times, you are not signing up to play for the specific coach, you’re signing a contract with the club as a whole. Personal circumstances change, especially during Covid, so do your research on all of the coaches in the club, how they are trained, their philosophy and teaching methods, etc. I played volleyball in college, and the coach who recruited me was not the one I ended up playing for. I had to decide if the school was enough to keep me there (it was), and this is the same in the club world. Also, don’t assume that a paid and professional coach at a big club is better than a volunteer coach at a small club. There are amazing people within the Badger Region who are passionate and knowledgeable at all different levels and sizes. For more information on this, make sure to check out the interview with Marouane Jafir on what his experience was coming from a professional volleyball background to coaching young kids.
Recruiting
Ahh recruiting, the arms race of youth sports. This year has been especially hard because of the missed opportunities on both sides of the fence due to Covid: players haven’t been able to play, and coaches haven’t been able to see them play. But what you can do is communicate and do your research. Make sure the school has the major you think you want and also any potential fallbacks. Look for virtual tours, look at the distance from home, the experience of a small city or a big city, a smaller school or a bigger school. Much like choosing a club, there are benefits to all of those categories. Don’t listen to the social media noise from the DI recruit in your area or whom you follow on social media, listen to your gut. Listen to your mind and where you feel most comfortable.
Communication
And again, communicate. Talk with the coaching staff of a school you’re interested in. My husband is a DI recruiting coordinator and is on the phone with potential recruits a lot. A secret? They know you’re nervous, they know it’s awkward, it’s ok. Do your homework and have some questions prepared to ask the coach you’re talking with. Most schools aren’t offering athletic scholarships or spots on rosters just based on talent. They also take into account character and how you will fit into the culture of their team. Take some time to communicate with them and show them who you really are. An offer is a business decision, not a character determination, and truthfulness goes a long way on both sides. If a school isn’t the right fit, let the coach know as soon as you know. They’ll appreciate it. If a coach lets you know that they have filled what would have potentially been your spot with someone else, accept that decision with grace and move on, but don’t sever ties. The volleyball world is a very small one, and yes, communication is constant, even among coaches competing for the same players or in the same area.
Choices & Struggles
One of the books I’m reading right now is by Mark Manson (I’ll let you Google the title as it’s not family friendly) and a quote is resonating with me: “Who you are is defined by what you’re willing to struggle for.” Read that again and really let it sink in. The book talks about how we all really want the same things in life — to be happy, healthy, have our families safe, etc.- but what are we willing to struggle for to get it? Because there are always struggles.
Questions for yourself
So I turn that back to you to reflect on – what are you willing to struggle for related to club volleyball? Do you just want to play with friends? Great, then are you willing to struggle with maybe not being on the most competitive team and winning all the time — and parents, are you OK with that as well? Do you want to win and be at the top of your game? Awesome, so then you’re willing to put in hours of work outside of the gym on strength training, mental training, proper nutrition, missing out on time with friends and school events, getting enough sleep, etc.? Do you see where I’m going with this?
In a time where we’re bombarded with all of the great things on social media, take a step back before you shut down and really look at it. That person with the perfect body? They work out hours a day and likely have a regimented diet. Is that something you’re willing to struggle with? All of that informational bombardment cannot tell you what YOU want to struggle with in order to get what you desire. That is a decision that you’re going to need to make on your own.
Final thoughts
The bottom line and the point in all of this is: block out the bombardment and focus on the facts and the direct communication. Don’t get to the point where you shut down, because that will lead to later problems with clubs, coaches and potentially the overall club experience. Take some time to breathe, do your own research rather than relying on the rumors from other people, and really decide what is best for you.
Once that decision is made, stick with it. You don’t owe anyone an explanation besides “this is what is best for our family” and that’s on them if they don’t agree with it. Do what makes YOU happy, and the rest will fall into place.
